Am I still a Wesleyan?

I want you, dear reader, to close your eyes (not really, you have to read) and picture the following scene:  I'm sitting in Stewart 6, the biggest lecture hall on campus, during my first weekend on campus.  We're in the middle of a information seminar on field education, and my eyes are starting to glaze over.  In the hopes of keeping from embarrassing myself by snoring in front of 150 people I don't know, I start rifling through the contents of the packet I received on entrance.  Within I discover two sheets of paper that comprise a complete listing of all incoming students, for the purpose of matching them with their field education advisor.  Now, PTS divides the students up according to denomination, so every student's denominational affiliation was listed next to their name.  One whole sheet is made up of PCUSA (that's Presbyterian, I didn't know that acronym before I came here) but PTS is a Presbyterian seminary and there are rules about that stuff, so it only makes sense that half the students would be PCUSA.  The other sheet, my sheet, is all the random, confused people who went to the wrong denomination's seminary.  I'm bored, remember, so I start scanning the list, looking for familiar names or interesting denominations (I was really bored).

Here's what I notice: I am the only Wesleyan in my class.

Wait a second, there's another guy from IWU here!  -  Nope, he's Nazarene.  Really? I'm the only one? Yep, the only one.

Okay, so, its not quite that radical.  There are a few Methodist students, like my suitemate (is that why they put us together?), and a very few others who would be part of the broader Wesleyan/Methodist tradition, but not many.  And there's no one from the Wesleyan denomination except me.  It might sound weird, but that was a lonely feeling.  It was discouraging in a strange way.  I mean, my family doesn't exactly identify strongly with the Wesleyan tradition (I'm the most Wesleyan of the bunch), so it shouldn't have been that big of a deal, but it was for whatever reason.

It became clear to me, quite quickly, that the differences weren't in name only during another orientation session.  This session was the sexual ethics session, and it was like nothing I've been involved in before. The basic message was this: We realize that you're going to drink, and likely drink too much.  We realize that you're going to have sex with each other.  Just please don't do those two things in combination, because then we might have to deal with lawsuits.  Now, I realize that the seminary was just trying to cover its bases legally, but really?  We have to have that talk in seminary!?  What am I missing?  Has no one ever read the Sermon on the Mount?

My classes, which I'll write more about later, have also been an excursion into the unknown.  My Systematic Theology class was basically a class in contextual theology, which I had never really encountered before.  My Biblical Studies classes treat the Biblical text in ways they simply don't at IWU.  My Doctrine of Election class is about as Reformed as a class could possibly be.  All of these classes have exposed me to much different traditions than my own.  (I think this is a good thing and, again, I'll say more about my classes individually later)

The question now becomes whether this environment, which is so different from my previous context, and which has challenged my tradition in so many ways, has caused me question whether or not I am or want to be a Wesleyan.

The answer: No

I actually find myself embracing things that made me roll my eyes at IWU, due to over-saturation.  I'm doing a paper on John Wesley, for instance, something I never once did at IWU since it seemed too cliche.  I even had to go to an abandoned, unlit corner of the basement of the library to find John Wesley's works.   I had to laugh at the irony of Wesley being stuffed into a janky corner that way.  That definitely wouldn't have happened at IWU!

Similarly, I'd love to have a conversation with someone, anyone, about the importance of personal holiness.

See, I feel as if holiness is something largely lacking at PTS.  We're very good at social justice, which I'll call social holiness.  The problem is that personal holiness has largely been collapsed into social holiness.  What does it mean to live a holy life at PTS?  It means that you love others, take care of the environment, and don't judge people.  Some would also add that you must witness to Jesus Christ, thanks to Karl Barth's focus on Christ and Prof. Guder's "Missional Theology" class.  Not that these are not important issues or behaviors that should characterize Christians, but isn't there something more offered in the Christian life?

There's something lacking in this conception of holiness, there's a sort of hopelessness attached to it.  We don't even talk about our personal sins, since we can't really hope to do anything about it.  The transformation of the individual has largely been reduced to the issues of self-worth and equality.  Has not Christ's death on the cross done something more?  Is the glorious resurrection of Christ, and through Him us as well, not more powerful than this?  I simply feel that Jesus Christ offers the hope of a totally new kind of life for the individual, as well as for the community.  In fact, I think its likely that one cannot completely have one without the other.  How can a transformed community exist apart from transformed individuals?

My recent reading of Scripture has only served to confirm this conviction.  I've read through the entire NT in the last couple of months (if you've never done it, do it soon, its wonderful), and I see holiness everywhere.  So many of the epistles exhort the reader to be holy, to sin no more, that those who sin are not the children of God.

Bottom line, I've embraced my Wesleyan tradition more since coming here than I would have previously.  I'm still working through my thoughts on predestination and election, but so far even Barth hasn't convinced me I need to become Reformed.  I am more convinced now than ever that John Wesley was on to something, and that holiness is not only possible but necessary.

Am I still a Wesleyan?  Without question.

1 Peter 1:15-16 - "but like the Holy One who called you, be holy yourselves also in all your behavior; because it is written, 'You shall be holy, for I am holy.'"

2 Peter 1:3 - "His divine power has given us everything we need for life and godliness.."

1 John 2:1 - "My dear children, I write this to you so that you will not sin."
2:3 - "We know that we have come to know him if we obey his commands."